7 things you need for your NYC apartment that do not exist (yet)

Share this Article

Apps, schmapps.  We predict that the next entrepreneurial revolution will unfold not in Silicon Alley, but right inside your very own NYC apartment, beginning with:

  1. A sleeper-sofa that can be adjusted from comfortable to uncomfortable depending on the guest and/or desired departure date
  2. Carbon monoxide and smoke detectors that send you an email when the batteries are low instead of waking your kid up at 3 in the morning
  3. A renovation estimate that includes a line item for bribes, kickbacks and markups
  4. A wee-wee pad hut that doubles as ottoman or coffee table
  5. A sound-proofed sleep-training room in the building with closed circuit television, for babies learning to sleep through the night and the neighbors/parents hoping to sleep through the night
  6. Self-adjusting window shades that detect nudity within your apartment and ugly nudity without
  7. Combo washer/dryer that not only masquerades as a dishwasher, but doubles as one


Related posts:

15 ways to tell a real New Yorker from a poser

I am a New Yorker and I want my $19,000 back

Top 18 contractor excuses

9 things not to do to (or in) your apartment this spring