Mortgage starts with MORT, from the Latin word for "death." There's a reason for that.
- "Don't worry, we won't charge you any points..." Translation: The bank charges you a higher rate and pays the broker the difference.
- "We've got everything we need." Translation: Two days before closing, you will asked to provide pay stubs dating back to your paper route in the 80s
- "Lock in now - rates will never be better." Translation: Rates dropping in five, four, three, two, one...
- "This will be done in a couple of days." Translation: I am getting back from my honeymoon two weeks after you are supposed to close.
- "We'll take care of everything." Translation: Fill out this form and provide these 30 documents.
Veronica X." is a Canadian by birth, an Upper West Sider by nature, and an Upper East Sider by choice and circumstance. She is presently looking to buy an apartment big enough for her family, her books, and her shoes - not necessarily in that order.