The Academy Awards are on Sunday, and we can't wait to see who takes home the prizes. But seeing as we're obsessed with NYC real estate, these are the movies we'd really like to see made—and later feted by the Oscars.
A buyer who has lost every apartment bidding war he's ever participated in this past decade sets his sights on his nemesis: the broker who has represented the listings. Warning: includes a graphic scene of a man accosted by a bear rug at an open house.
Bridge of Cries
In this coming-of-age story, Luke's family moves from Hoboken to Fort Greene in the middle of seventh grade. Can he maintain his old friendships and make new ones? Can he stay a Devils fan?
Sublet and the City
Single Manhattanites break leases, heels, and hearts while looking for true love and square footage.
A torrid affair between an Upper East Sider and an Upper West Sider begins with seemingly innocent flirting on a real estate message board. Loyalty to their respective neighborhoods threaten to tear them apart (as does the insanely slow crosstown bus). Will they consume Zabar's, Eli's, or each other?
Mad Max: Beyond Bushwick
In a post-apocalyptic NYC, a landlord chases a wayward, non-paying tenant all over Brooklyn. Features astounding CGI showing a 1000-foot condo tower rising in one month.
The Doorman Always Rings Twice
An NYU professor is found murdered in his rent-stabilized West Village apartment. Will his doorman stand accused of the crime or be the next victim of foul play?
The Big Long
Real estate investors intent on identifying the next "up and coming" neighborhood take to their algorithms and sub-Reddits for intel, only to discover that there is no real neighborhood left to call "new."
Spotlight: Slumlord Billionaire
Intrepid reporters at The New York Post uncover one unnamed presidential candidate siphoning off of condo management fees to fund his presidential campaign, leaving residents of tony buildings without heat and hot water.
A Romeo and Juliet tale between a Hipster and a Hasid who live on the same Williamsburg block.