Dear Ms. Demeanor,
I'm single and lead an active social life, if you know what I mean. I find that my doormen look at me disapprovingly when I walk in/out with a different guy. It's a vibe more than a spoken thing and I really don't appreciate it. If I were a guy, they'd be high-fiving me. What can I do about it?
Single and loving it
In a sense, doormen are like substitute parents. They keep you safe, collect your dry-cleaning, put an umbrella over your head when its raining--and judge you all the time. The only difference from a parent is the direction the money flows.
WIth their hands on the door and their eyes and ears on everyone in the building, doormen are also professional busy-bodies, and busy-bodies love it when you are getting busy. You could choose to accept that as a fact of life and comfort yourself with the knowledge that their disapproval likely comes with side dish of envy for all that "activity."
Or, next time they stare you down, give it right back to him. If they make a comment, tell them your personal life is not their concern and you will report it if it happens again.
Ms. Demeanor is channeled by a longtime Manhattan vertical dweller and real-estate voyeur who writes under the pen name Jamie Lauren Sutton. She is here to commiserate, calm and correct. Please email your quandaries to [email protected] and put "Dear Ms. Demeanor" in the subject line.