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You have a new roomie, and, still in the honeyroom phase, you choose your words very carefully when she/he does something that bugs you. For example, when your roommate...
- ...has sex too loudly, you say, "Sounds like your date last night was really successful."
- ...feeds the cat on the kitchen counter, you say, "Look at this cute personalized bowl I found for Muffin. It fits perfectly right here next to the garbage can!"
- ...is a little late with the rent, you say, "Gosh the rent is late and so is my period... Can you write a check while I go to Duane Reade?"
- ...cuts her/his toenails on the sofa, you say, "Have you tried nail salon downstairs? Mani/pedis are only 20 dollars Monday-Wednesday." (Guilty on this one. Sorry Sherri!).
- ... posts embarrassing pictures of you vacuuming in the nude on Facebook, you say, "I have to de-tag all those pictures. My grandmother is a Facebook addict!'
Veronica X. is a Canadian by birth, an Upper West Sider by nature, and an Upper East Sider by choice and circumstance. She has finally found an apartment big enough for her family, books, and shoes and is now in the process of renovating it.