The Real.Est List
10 things you never want to hear in the middle of the night
Garbage trucks and tequila-soused co-eds aside, there are a few things every vertical dweller dreads hearing in the middle of the night....
- Death rattle from your a/c in a heat wave
- Doorman buzzing up your old boyfriend while your new one sleeps nude beside you
- That weird rolling marbles sound
- (after husband spent entire day hanging the new flatscreen) CRASH
- Cat going scratch-scratch-scratch in your Zen sand garden
- Paving trucks on Second Avenue drowning out the noise of subway construction
- Screaming from next door... Quiet... The doorbell... Neighbor dressed in boxers and undershirt: "Allie threw me out. Can I sleep here tonight?"
- "Aaaah! Something bit me!!!"
- Your 70-year-old neighbor having noisy sex with your 50-year old super
- Mid-romantic evening: "Do you think Duane Reade is still open? We're out of condoms."