Ms. Demeanor's Vertical Etiquette

Dear Ms. Demeanor: Trapped between two rival board neighbors

By Jamie Lauren Sutton  | August 11, 2010 - 7:23AM
image

Dear Ms. Demeanor,

My two next-door neighbors are heads of competing factions on the coop board.  They knock on my door at night and trash-talk the other.  How do I stay somewhat neighborly and neutral while still having friends/advocates on the board? 

Sincerely,

Sweetly Switzerland


Dear Sweetly,

Actually, Switzerland isn’t so sweet.  Take a lesson from a country as famous for its army knives as its chocolate: Fight hard to look as though you are not fighting.  

A few noncommittal but supportive comments may be helpful: “That must be very frustrating.” “It sounds like you have your work cut out for you.”  “What a thankless job!  You are so great to donate your time.”

However, if you really want a voice on the board, get on the board and then the two trash-talkers can start trash-talking you instead of each other.  

In the meantime, to avoid the late-night knocks, whether on or off the board, tell the neighbors you go to sleep at 8 pm and then remember not to sing too loudly during Glee reruns.

-------

Ms. Demeanor is channeled by a longtime Manhattan vertical dweller and real-estate voyeur who writes under the pen name Jamie Lauren Sutton. She is here to commiserate, calm and correct. Please email your quandaries to [email protected].

See all Ms. Demeanor's advice here.

Brick Underground articles occasionally include the expertise of, or information about, advertising partners when relevant to the story. We will never promote an advertiser's product without making the relationship clear to our readers.

topics: