8 reasons your children should grow up in New York

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You may have heard horror stories about raising your kids in the big, bad city, but don't believe the hype. In fact, bringing up baby in the urban jungle gives you some distinct advantages over your parental counterparts in the 'burbs. Some things to consider before you flee for Connecticut:
1. When you have kids in the city, they never drive. Ipso facto, they never drive drunk.
2. If you grew up in the suburbs, you know that all the bad stuff (that seemed really, really good at the time) goes down in basements. In an apartment, however, there are few places to hide.
3. Your kids will accept every woman, man, other gender, any race, any creed, any size, in any form of dress or undress, with equanimity. They might not even notice there is a difference. 
4. Thousands of American parents every year have to bid their kids goodbye when they make the inevitable post-college decision to try their hand at NYC. But if you already live here, your kids will never leave you.
5. New York young'uns will not insist on, and may even balk at, home-cooked meals.
6. Some help with the whole "it takes a village" thing: you can add the doorman, your super, even the deli guy to your roster of neighborhood spies mentors.

7. A NYC kid skipping school to see giant metallic balloon animals is most likely at a Jeff Koons exhibit; a suburban kid skipping school to see giant metallic balloon animals is most likely dropping acid.
8. If you wait on line for the swing set before you learn to walk, you learn a little thing called "patience."

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