BrickUnderground

Before I moved into my first rental apartment, my dear Jewish mother gave me this advice: “Whatever you do sweetie… make sure to shtup the super.  This way he’ll take care of you!” 

WHAT??  I knew very little Yiddish, but in my world, shtup meant to have sex; and I couldn’t believe my mother was suggesting I hustle myself to get good service in a New York City apartment building.   I mean, I know we New Yorkers will go to great lengths to be taken care of, but this was a bit extreme. 

When the three biggest real estate brokerages in New York City decline to weigh in on a New York Times story about sales commissions, it’s time to tune in.

According to the story, which ran on the cover of the Times’ real estate section this weekend, the traditional 6 percent commission on NYC apartment sales is flu-ish, if not quite dead as a doornail. The national average is apparently 5.36 percent, says a real estate research firm quoted in the article, and New York City is no different. 

The big firms--Prudential Douglas Elliman, Corcoran, and Halstead--didn't comment, at least not on the record.  But alternative brokerages like Charles Rutenberg Realty, RealDirect and The Burkhardt Group were only too happy to share their thoughts, along with the details of their low commission structures.

As we noted earlier this week, landlord TF Cornerstone is offering one month free rent for new leases in its building The Fairfax, located at 201 East 69th. We took a look on TF Cornerstone's website to see if they are offering concessions at their other buildings. 2 Gold is offering one month free rent. Four units are available, ranging from a studio listed at $2,118 to a two-bedroom, two bath for $4,897. There are six availabilities at 45 Wall Street, also offering one month free rent, with prices starting at $2,608 for a one bedroom up to $4,892 for a 1,347 square foot loft with two bathrooms. Both buildings are full service, and have the requisite gym and outdoor spaces. 45 Wall, a conversion, has unusual layouts.

Six years ago, I had a listing on Central Park South that was a beautiful park view apartment. There was just one little problem: The pigeons nesting on the balustrades outside the living room window. I could not sell that place because nobody could see past the pigeon poop.

Eventually, with the help of the super and some artfully laid sticky bird gel (pigeons apparently don't like it when their feet get sticky), we persuaded the pigeons to move on. As soon as they relocated, the apartment sold (well).

Over the years I have come to call the shortcomings of my new listings the “pigeon in the apartment". Here are some of the other “pigeons” I have dealt with over the past two decades.