Ms. Demeanor's Sex, Laundry & Vertical Etiquette

Neighbor's garbage pickup is ruining my life, and the hamster's

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Dear Ms. Demeanor,

Every other morning around 5 a.m., it’s the same thing…

First the roar of the trucks, then the scrape of metal-on-metal as the garbage bins are lifted off the street and hoisted into the air, the ka-chunk, ka-chunk as the contents are shaken into the belly of the truck and finally, the slam-ka-blam as the bins are set ever so not gently back onto the sidewalk.

This continues for about 25 minutes, just long enough to wake me and the entire family, dog, cat and hamster included.

The garbage in question belongs to a large building next door, which fills the entire eastern edge of the block, running from our quiet, brownstone-lined street to the edge of a two-way commercial boulevard. Why, oh why, do they put their garbage out on our side??? Does the city determine where garbage is picked up and is there anyway we can petition to have it changed?

Sleepless on Seventy-First



Dear Sleepless,

What an awful wake-up call! In my opinion, we should all be gently roused each day by the smell of brewing coffee and warm biscuits drizzled with butter and honey… alas, we live in our beloved Big Nasty, where a leisurely approach to the start of the day is less likely.

I did some checking with the city and was informed by a charming gentleman at the Department of Sanitation that, as long as the truck driver and garbage handlers have appropriate access, they don’t really care exactly where the refuse is deposited for pick-up.

Apparently, it is the building, and more specifically, the superintendent of said building, who decides which tenants are to be inconvenienced – and you can rest assured that the board carries some weight when making that decision.

You wouldn’t be out of line in requesting an audience at their next board meeting where you might plead your case for moving the pick-up spot. (Don’t powder over the dark circles under your eyes.)

A more effectual strategy might involve freshly baked muffins (or chocolate croissants from the local bakery) delivered on a regular basis to the super & his cohorts, along with an impassioned plea to relocate the garbage to a busier, more commercial location.

More from Ms. Demeanor:

Home invasion by co-op vice president

Ambushed in the elevator

My doorman helps my teenage daughter sneak out at night

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